Handling Long Distance Relationships

Long distance relationships: yeah, I’ve had a few. With the advent of the internet, an entire new world of long distance relationships has opened up. People are looking for any advice they can find on how to make their long distance relationship more successful — well I’ve been there, and I can help you.

Who am I? And what makes me qualified to give long distance relationship advice?

My name’s Andrea — I’m in my forties and as a busy single mother, I started taking advantage of the rise of Internet dating over the past fifteen years. My circumstances have been varied and different — some of my partners were within driving distance, some were quite literally a world away.

There are other reasons for long distance relationships to happen, and believe it or not they are often viable and successful means of forming relationships. While not always a permanent solution, in fact rarely a permanent solution, dating someone over a long distance can be done right.

First off — why do we do this? Reasons for forming a long distance relationship are myriad. Some relationships start out short distance, or at least medium, only to become long distance. My first long distance relationship happened this way — I was dating a man my age who got a better job in a bigger city across the country. We were committed to one another and had even discussed marriage. Naturally, a long distance relationship seemed to be the only solution.

Other people meet business partners at conferences, or perhaps meet Internet users on forums or through eDating services and must maintain a relationship at way more than arm’s length.

I’ll give you 5 simple pieces of long distance relationship advice from my own personal experience that should help keep your long distance relationship in the black — long enough for you to decide if its worth a move to be together.

Long Distance Relationship Advice – Piece of Advice #1. Establish one ultimately and always effective communication channel.

The first thing you must do in a long distance relationship is to establish an effective communication channel — something that will always work. Internet may go down, phones could get turned off, you never know. Establishing this will let your partner know that you’re serious and allow the relationship to move forward.

Most people think that telephone is the most convenient mode of communication but apart from the telephone services, there are some other alternatives you can use. Instant messenger, email, VOIP phone, and conventional mail can also be very effective if you know how to use them and you both have access. Even if you don’t know how to use a certain piece of technology, it would be worth it to your partner and meaningful for you to learn.

Each of the communication channels has its own advantages and disadvantages and therefore you must start to explore each of them to enhance your communication experience.

Long Distance Relationship Advice – Piece of Advice #2. Plan to meet each other as often as is feasible.

Nothing is more important than planning to meet each other again at an interval of time throughout the period of your long distance relationship. This will help both you and your partner to catch up with each other over the things that you cannot do while apart. Phones, emails, pictures, skywriting — all very romantic but nearly impossible to really distill in your memory.

Only touch and closeness and the anticipation of seeing each other again can really give you the excitement, hope and companionship your relationship needs.

Long Distance Relationship Advice – Piece of Advice #3. Surprise your partner.

Now and then you want something amazing to happen in your life, as does your partner. My current long distance relationship is with a man who is perfect at this particular item.

On my birthday this year, he had a barbershop quartet go to my house and sing me happy birthday and some other songs — it was totally romantic, unexpected, and exotic, and I love him for it.

The point is to occasionally surprise you partner with cards, gifts, letters, candy, flowers, and anything else you think might blow their expectations out of the water — something apart from your normal correspondence. Put your imagination to use and your partner will be sure to love your effort in keeping them happy. Sending unexpected gifts to your partner will always spice up your long distance relationship regardless how far away your partner may be.

Long Distance Relationship Advice – Piece of Advice #4. Build a hobby that you can both share.

By building and keeping a hobby, both of you will have something to discuss and work on throughout your distance relationship. I had a long distance boyfriend who was an artist, and we would send tiny little drawings and paintings and knick knacks to one another as a way of saying hello.

Finding something to do online can be quite interesting judging from its speed and reach ability but never leave out that conventional hands-on hobby, because you do not need to have your partner’s physical presence to experience the little lift you may need on any given day. Long distance relationships are hard, after all.

Long Distance Relationship Advice – Piece of Advice #5. Capture and share interesting moments

Throughout the period of your long distance relationship (remember — some day you might live near one another again, and you will think of this period as a strengthening) you can always capture some interesting moments of yours by exchanging photos, video clips, audio recordings, etc. The Internet and the technology available on it is ever expanding, and who knows what sort of communications you will soon be able to have.

One day, having a long distance relationship may be the norm — thankfully, we’re not there yet, but with the dawn of the internet and the modern face of people and info sharing, long distance dating is becoming more popular.

It’s important to remember these 5 pieces of advice. My happy relationships, no matter the distance, seem to have always included some semblance of them.

I urge you to consider long distance relationships with respect. Many people take these connections lightly, when really the emotions people feel are just as great over distance as they are in proximity. It is easy to get caught up in the moment when there isn’t a partner in your face to ground you, to remind you that this is just one moment in a relationship, and arguments can get just as out of hand as passion can.

A long distance relationship can be successful, but many people end up hurt and confused because of bad communication and laziness.

I have had just under ten long distance relationships over the past 20 years, and I am friends with most of the men I spent time with. Don’t be afraid to be in a long distance relationship. You’ll learn just as much about yourself as you will about someone else.

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