Flirting and Body Language

Flirting and body language are two sides of the same coin. Understanding how a person’s body language translates to flirting signals is one of the most important lessons to learn when you’re trying to start a relationship with someone. We say very little with our words when we first meet one another, it is only after our bodies talk that we can begin to have a real conversation.

Believe it or not, men and women do not behave that differently when communicating with their bodies. Yes, the two genders have different ways of expressing their flirtatious feelings, but flirting and body language is basically equal between both men and women. Here’s a breakdown of male and female body language and why it means they’re interested in you. Notice how similar the two are in terms of their body language.

Male Flirting through Body Language

• Eye contact — When a man enters a room, he generally “scans” the room looking for females that are instantly attractive to him physically. What attracts men? Scientists tell us that men prefer a woman’s body if her waist size is 70% of her hip size, no matter the size it is the ratio that counts. Still other men will be attracted to a certain kind of face or hair color. No matter the why, you can bet that if a man enters a room and locks eyes with you, he isn’t just trying to remember who you are. He likes you.
• Cowboy Posture — When a man is talking to you, take notice if he hits the “cowboy pose” — hands on his hips or in his belt area, arms akimbo, head slightly tilted down. He may not LOOK like a cowboy, but he’s certainly opening his body to you and (subconsciously) trying to display his sexual characteristics.
• Displays of  ”Strength” — In the modern era, a man may display “strength” by showing off how much money he makes, how smart he is, or literally how “strong” he is. If a man is “showing off” for you, you can bet this is flirtatious body language.
• “Preening” – When a man runs his hands through his hair (messing it up or fixing it up) he’s “preening” for you, unconsciously attempting to make himself look nice for a girl he thinks is pretty. Not just women do this — the next time you’re talking to a man, see if you catch him “preening” for you. That means he’s yours.

Female Flirting through Body Language

• Eye contact — When a woman makes eye contact with you, it does not instantly mean she is flirting. This is one of the few differences in the ways men and women use body language to flirt — only when a woman “holds” that eye contact is she indicating a deeper interest in a man. If you notice a woman locking eyes with you then looking down to your mouth, you’re even more in for it. She’s indicating she wants to kiss you.
• Sexual Posing — Like it or not and believe it or not, women will strike poses that indicate how “sexy” they are. Sitting or standing in certain poses (like the “cowboy pose” that men use) are telltale signs that a woman is interested in you. If you notice her sitting in such a way as to make her body look thinner or to show a little more skin, you know she’s into you.
• Displays of  ”Health” and “Class” — In the early 20th century, pale skin and a little extra weight were indications that a woman was high class enough to not have to do physical labor which would tan her skin and make her lose a little weight. These days, a woman may go after tan skin and try to be as skinny as possible to indicate that she is high class enough (and healthy enough) for your sexual interest. This is like a man’s “display of strength” — and remember, it is usually subconscious.
• Leaning in close — If you’re talking to a woman and she’s looking away or trying to pull away from your conversation, that’s a sure sign that she doesn’t want to talk to you. If, on the other hand, she leans in and seems to be paying particular attention to what you’re saying (and laughing at your dumb jokes) you know she’s into you.

Men and women may be different in many important ways, but when it comes to sending sexual signals with our body language, we behave in remarkably similar ways. Remember this next time you’re out and you lock eyes with an attractive potential lover — he or she is probably thinking the exact same way you are.

This entry was posted on Thursday, October 22nd, 2009 at 10:31 am and is filed under Romance. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.