Marriage Tips and Advice

If you’re looking for marriage tips and advice, either marrying for life is a new thing to you and you want to avoid the pitfalls of married life, or you have been married for a while and you’re looking for new strategies.

Marriage is wonderful, but like anything worthwhile, it take a certain amount of work. Getting married isn’t the end–it’s the beginning.

Make every effort to follow these suggestions and your marriage will be better for it.

Get a Financial Plan

In poll after poll, married couples say they fight most about money. Couples just starting out tend to have money problems, which is a bad way to go into a marriage. Still, generations of people in love have weathered financial difficulties to build a life together.

Arguing about money gets harder as the years go by. If you have been married 5 years, 10 years, even 20 years, and the same financial mistakes are being made, any partner is going to lose their patience. So eliminate the #1 problem most marriage partners have and work out a financial plan.

This isn’t just building for retirement. This is having a household budget and spending limits. Have rules and boundaries that neither of you cross, then stick to them. When the two of your are building towards the good life together, you’ll be happier.

Keep Talking – Resolve Everything

The first idea was about both planning and communication, and the second marriage tip is about communication, too. Many couples stop talking to one another as a form of punishment or even emotional abuse. Never let this be the operating procedure. Talk through your troubles and resolve your issues. Ending dialogue simply lets resentments linger.

Show Respect in Public

A relationship is built on mutual respect. If you don’t show your spouse respect, you can’t expect others to do the same. If you are constantly hectoring your spouse in front of your kids, your children won’t respect your spouse (or you, for that matter). Show the people in your life how it’s done.

Consider you and your husband or wife like two members of a basketball officiating crew. You never show up your fellow referee in front of the players. Always maintain solidarity.

I suggest you always show respect, in public or private. But this goes double for public displays. Making your spouse the subject of public ridicule is a particular and grievious insult. You can compounding the mistake by embarrassing them in front of friends, family, and strangers alike. Never disrespect your spouse in front of other people.

Pick Your Battles – Timing Is Key

Along the same lines, pick your battles. Know what’s important and what is petty. Don’t select every mistake or misspoken word as an occasion for a fight. You don’t like Internet trolls, so don’t be trolling for fights in your home life. Let most everything roll off your back, as they say, and only argue when important principles or decisions are on the line.

Try New Things – Out of the Rut

Avoid falling into the rut. You get bored with the same routine, so it’s natural your spouse will, too. Try to keep things fresh by trying out new things every once in a while. Think of things your husband or wife might like and give them a shot.

Look Your Best – Marriage Tips

So many people look at marriage as a time to let yourself go and relax. But you want to continue to please your spouse, so do your best to look your best. Time passes and everyone ages, but an aging person can age gracefully. Show you care by taking care of yourself. Dress nice and smell nice. Keep yourself in decent shape. You’ll like yourself more and you’ll encourage your loved ones to follow suit. No promises, but this is a benefit to your marriage partner, and to you.

Say “I Love You” – Marriage Suggestions

Don’t forget to say “I love you”. Studies show that couples who say “I love you” every single day are more likely to have lingering positive feelings about one another. Say it and mean it, and your marriage is going to be a lot healthier.

Use Compliments – Praise Him/Her

Also, compliment your spouse when they please you. Compliment a woman on her looks and she’s more likely to pay attention to her appearance, in order to please you. But don’t make this just about outward appearances. Compliment your wife or husband about their work ethic, their cooking, their parenting abilities, their personality or people skills, their dedication to the family–whatever. Heck, compliment her on her parallel parking, if that’s all that comes to mind.

Get in the habit of compliments. It makes your spouse feel better. It lets them know you’re paying attention. It keeps them from feeling like you’re taking them for granted.

Say You’re Sorry – Be a Good Husband

When things do go wrong and you lose your temper, remember to say you’re sorry. Once again, say it and mean it. Understand that we can’t always be perfect–you or your partner. Forgive them for their slights and transgressions, and own up to your mistakes when you make them. Don’t be defensive and unwilling to apologize.

Put Yourself in Their Shoes

Empathy is the ability to put yourself in another person’s shoes. You use your imagination to imagine what it feels like when you act the way you do. Listen to your loved one talk about their concerns, worries, and troubles, then use your imagination to imagine what it feels like to be them at the moment. Empathy leads to sympathy, where you genuilly feel regret and concern for this other person. Learn to empathize and sympathise, and you’ll be able to share with one another the joys and the sorrows of marriage. The first makes you happier, but the second makes you stronger.

Remember You’re on the Same Team

This bears repeating again. When a couple gets married, one of them changes their name to show you’re both on the same team. The name change is like changing into the team’s uniform. Remember that you have agreed to work together, not against one another. Be a good teammate.

Laugh Together – Being a Good Wife

Remember to laugh together. The family that laughs together, stays together.

Seriously, the marriage couple which can laugh together usually stays together. Enjoy one another’s company. You married to enrich each other’s lives, so remember to enjoy the richness of life by sharing laughter with one another. Laughter releases chemicals in the brain which combat depression and lethargy. Sharing laughter is one of the best marriage tips.

Remember, marriage is not the end. Marriage is just the beginning. So don’t assume you have to stop working at relationships once the wedding is over. That’s when the real work begins–the work of building a life together. It’s rewarding work, though.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, December 14th, 2010 at 12:11 am and is filed under Relationships. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.